Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Lonely Coding

There are a lot of interested I've carried throughout my life. I've dabbled in so many arts and craftworkings and skills, but never really mastered anything. I've wanted to be a writter, a painter, a movie director, a programmer, and probably a dozen other creative endevours. I've shared all these with someone.

There are three people in my life that I've ever really considered my best friends. Unlike the childhood movies you might be used to, we weren't like the four musketeers. As a matter of fact, for the most part they barely know each other. But what they all have in common is that at one point, we were supposed to do something big.

I was supposed to start a successful art career alongside Ben.

Matt and I were planning to build a solid tech company from our ideas.

And, along with David, I may have made gripping films of a powerful nature.

None of it came to pass, even though we are still great friends. Ben doesn't draw anymore, David never finishes any stories he writes, and Matt might be a decent SysAdmin, but he can't code a lick.

So where does this leave me? After much of my life looking forward to realizing a dream of potential alongside one of my best friends, how do I drag myself through it alone? It makes me wonder how much I wanted to success, and how much I wanted it alongside a really good friend.

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